This past year we have had our fair share of doctors appointments.
Its been real....
At each of these appointments, I am instructed to check-in on a tablet, which of course asks me the same ten questions, at pretty much EVERY.SINGLE.APPOINTMENT...and most of the questions are just a bit annoying...
NO, we haven't moved since last week,
my phone number has not changed, since last week,
and NO, we have no new insurance coverage, since last week,
and yes, I am the same mother of these same kids..
same as last week...
see what I mean?
Why they ask me these same questions every single week is just beyond me...
But then, the tablet also asks me this question..."Is Melissa Unemployed?"
Whats it to you, tablet?
What does this question have to do with anything, really?
I stand there every single week, sometimes twice a week and even sometimes three times a week, and I can feel the blood in my face start to boil a bit.
I truly feel rage.
I have to click yes.
I hate to answer "YES" because clearly, I am not unemployed, I am so freaking employed I barely have time to breath, eat, sleep, cry, laugh, or urinate... I am on my 100th hour of overtime just this week, and I will never see that paycheck of double time and a half. I am so freaking employed it should be illegal to even ask a mom THAT question.
But I have to click yes, because society says so.
Being a mom is hard. Being a mom is a job.
Yes, society, motherhood is a JOB, period. Yes, it is awesome (some of the time (lol)), but mostly, it is the hardest job I have EVER had. And then you add a few "special needs" to that equation and it is even more than employment...I dont even have a word for it, because its just crazy and completely consuming.
I think the options to respond to this question should be a bit more courteous....
Question: Is Melissa Unemployed?
Answer Options: No, I am a freaking MOM.
There are times, when I wish I could get on my computer, type up a nicely written letter of resignation, had it to my boss on a Monday morning and start counting down the days until I can be unemployed or retired...but this JOB of being a mom, doesn't have that option. There is no manager...there is no retirement package or unemployment funds to collect. If I resign from my job, it would be catastrophic. It would be life altering, life changing, heart breaking turmoil for the people who are under me. And honestly, I think that should be enough to treat the position of "mom" as a much more respected type of employment.
Today, when the tablet asks this degrading question...perhaps I will click NO!
Take that tablet...and society.
Yesterday was a LONG 19 hour unpaid day at work for me.
It included so many things, I cant even list them all.
However, in all the crap, God still made it a point to remind me He was there.
Mason had an appointment with a new doctor, a nephrologist (kidney specialist) an hour away from our house in rush hour traffic....I had expected it was going to be a great time....but clearly my expectations were off, as normal...we did not get the best news there, but also, not any solid answers either. So, next week we will be off for more labs and tests...So please send up some specific prayers for him.
We left that appointment...both drained. I could just look at Mason and knew he had it...like his heart was just too heavy for anything else at that point.
But we quickly snapped out of it because after the appointment we headed straight for Gila River Arena for his very first concert! His excitement to see 'his favorite band' was all I needed to snap out of my pity party and forget reality a bit.
But then...more rush hour traffic.
Que new pity party.
God is funny like that.
Finally the concert starts, Masons eyes, his smile, his laughter, his singing along to every song, raising his hands, cheering, clapping, praying, praising, with all the hundreds and hundreds of other people doing the same thing, was such an incredible thing to watch.
No paycheck needed.
Being a mom is hard, but there are moments when the rewards are just so much greater than the job title.
Perhaps the tablet should ask:
Question: Is Melissa carrying out the jobs God has called her to?
I would be perfectly satisfied answering "Yes" because watching my son be so faithful in praise and worship, despite the crappy news from the doctor, says more than I could ever begin to say about myself.
In all the crap, He still reminds me He is there. And going from a doctor of disappointing news to a concert of worship and praise is the most obvious sign of just that.
Happy Friday Friends.